By Dixie It happens to all of us. Part of the human condition. Knowing you are not alone in feeling depressed sometimes does help…a little, but it ain’t no fun feeling down.
Disclaimer: The steps below are not a solution for long term or acute depression and/or suicidal thoughts which should be treated by a professional. There is no shame in getting help and there is no reason to suffer when there IS help available.
A great resource for depression is the National Alliance on Mental Health at www2.nami.org.
A resource for suicide prevention is the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 or www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org.
What the steps below are for is the Average Joe type of depression that comes after some negative type event like a relationship break up, dog ate your homework, etc. This kind of depression can even come after some great event like winning an award, doing a charity event or completing a major goal. It is usually self-limiting (doesn’t last for weeks or months) and does not interfere with your life long term. But it does make you feel lousy so lets look at how to minimize it.
Step 1: Take care of your physical needs. You are most at risk for depression when you are tired, hungry or lonely. Let’s take care of that first.
Eat something healthy. Why healthy? Your body needs nutrients to work better. Don’t think you can eat a plate of chili cheese fries and feel better. Eat some vegetables, lean protein, fruit. A real meal, not ramen noodles please.
Get some rest. Turn out the lights, get in bed and close your eyes. Your body needs real rest in order to function. Do NOT pick up that danged smartphone to check out your twitter account. Sleep. Now. If you can’t sleep because you are too upset, head to Step 2, then come back to this step.
Step 2: Take care of your emotional needs. Right now your head is filled to the brim with negative emotions like anger, resentment, fear, worry and you danged sure don’t feel like you are the best thing since sliced bread to anyone, especially yourself. Let’s change that. You need to open that head up and let those negative thoughts run out, then replace them with good stuff.
Do something physical:
Cry if you need to, punch pillows, do a primordial scream (not in an apartment please unless you want the po po at your door door).
Exercise. Some folks don’t cry readily or maybe you aren’t feeling like crying. Run, walk, box, dance. Sweat is the goal. Think of sweat as another way for the body to cry. It is another way to release those emotions.
Get the negative words out:
Connect: Phone a trusted friend, pray to God. Just tell someone what you are feeling.
Write it down: If you don’t want to talk, write a letter or journal what you are feeling. If it is embarrassing, or something you don’t want anyone to know, tear it up afterwards. The purpose is to get it OUT not broadcast it. By the way, puhleeze do NOT sent this letter, email, text etc. to your ex during this time. Duct tape your hand to the floor before you do that. No, no, no.
Fill your head with good thoughts:
Be grateful. Write down a list of everything you are thankful for today. If you can’t think of anything try having hot water in the shower, food in the frig, fairly clean air to breathe and clothes to wear. Most of us do have those things and a lot of other folks worldwide would really love to have just one of those. Really think about those things you are grateful for and keep writing on your list when you think of new things.
Laugh. Turn on a comedy channel, go to a funny movie. Google your favorite comedian and watch their latest YouTube.
Read, watch or do something uplifting. It may be an old movie you have seen before or a book you read when you were little. Take a walk around the block and look at the flowers, pet the neighbors dog, feed some ducks at the pond. Just do something to fill your head back up with good things about beauty, goodness, life…
Step 3: Do something now. After steps 1 and 2 you should be rested, fed, and thinking more positive thoughts.
It is time to take action. What you don’t want to do is just have a “feel good” moment, then fall back into a depressed mindset.
Set a goal: It can be something small like calling a buddy and scheduling lunch later in the day, or cleaning out your closet. It could also be something bigger like reworking your resume, making a list of prospective employers and sending out emails to friends who can get you interviews. In the words of the marketing gurus at Nike, Just Do It. Anything. Now.
Do something good for someone else: Pay for the person behind you at the toll booth, weed your mama’s flowerbed, write an email to encourage someone. Smile at strangers(not creepy smiles!) wave at your neighbors, open the door for someone, pick up a stray can on the sidewalk, take the shopping cart back inside for someone at the grocery store. There is always something you can do. And you never know what your one tiny gesture of kindness may so for someone…
Remember everyone is fighting a battle.
You are not alone.
You can make a big difference in other people’s lives.
And make a big difference in your own life.