By Dixie 
He’s a major league jerk. He lied, he cheated and he isn’t a bit remorseful. In fact, he blames YOU. He said he never would have done what he did if you were a better person, better looking, better acting. You told him to do some acting of his own, as in “act like a tree and LEAVE”.
And he is still doing the same vile things and talking to anyone and everyone about how terrible you are for throwing him out.
Why the heck should you forgive HIM? He most definitely does not deserve forgiveness and you definitely don’t want to be viewed as being weak—or accepting any blame for causing his actions.
ONE: Not forgiving him will eat you up. Here’s a test: say his name out loud and see how you feel. Blood boiling? Fists clenched? Mouth turned down in anger? You are giving this guy too much real estate in your head. You feeling angry and upset and talking trash, however well deserved, is doing nothing to him. Actually, if he does hear some blowback talk (and he will), you can count on him feeling justified about blaming you, ie “that crazy woman caused me to…”.
TWO: Indifference is the best revenge. Even if you have to fake it until you make it, getting on with your life in a positive way will let people, including him, know that you are strong and resilient. It will also make people start to question his sanity, not yours. Talk to the hand, Mista.
THREE: Forgiveness does not mean you are excusing the wrong. It is a choice you make to move on, cancelling the anger and bitterness. It does not minimize the other person’s actions, or eliminate consequences. It also doesn’t take away your feelings, at least not right away, but it allows you to break free from the role of victim.
So you know you need to forgive him. Somehow. How?
ONE: Make the decision to forgive him. Do it for yourself. Separate yourself from the negative feelings and decide to move forward. Realize the person may never change or ask for forgiveness or stop blaming you. All you can control is your own response.
TWO: Do something physical to get anger out. Punch a pillow for a few minutes, do some push-ups, take a spin class, get outside and run or walk fast. Do anything that will cause you to sweat. When you get angry again, repeat.
THREE: Talk it out with a good friend or counselor or write it down. Do it once and get it over with, don’t wallow in your feelings. If you write it out, tear up the paper afterwards or burn it like a ceremony to get on with your life. Get ‘er dun.
FOUR: Rebuild your life. Make plans to do something you enjoy. Make a bucket list. Read a book you have always wanted to read. Go to a comedy club. Sign up for an art class. Grab a buddy and plan a vacation.
And remember, this is your life. Don’t give up control of your life to someone else. Enjoy peace.